i have a major hurdle to jump over this month...

on may 25th, i will be having a CAT scan with contrast dye to check to see if my breast cancer has spread to my bones, lungs,etc. my one year  "cancerversary" will be on May 22nd.( just to note that my 6 year cancerversary for thyroid cancer will be on may 19th ) . after enduring six years of biannual  thyroid cancer  testing, while i still get nervous, i know what to expect from those tests. i will admit to being more than a little nervous about this new test for my breast cancer. while i will admit that the unease  that i feel when i am up for thyroid cancer testing  has decreased somewhat over the years, i still suffer from test anxiety. and i thought that  test anxiety in college was bad.

some people mark their cancerversary date from the end of their chemotherapy. others use their cancer diagnosis date or when they have  completed chemotherapy or radiation . i like to observe mine on the date that  i had surgery- the date that those cancer beasties were removed from my body. to me, that is something to celebrate. i love the overwhelming confidence that all of my surgeons have had with their work. they have all told me that my cancer was gone after the surgery. in fact, my thyroid cancer surgeon was insulted that i was going to have, not my decision but the radiologist and endocrinologist's decision, the radioactive I-131 treatment  afterward. my other two surgeons did not comment on my oncologist's decision that i needed the chemotherapy. well, actually, my general surgeon said that he had no idea what my oncologist would decide to do. it seems that i am always the one having the unusual type of cancer that definitely does not go by the book.

i think that a lot of my problems have been caused by  the red hair gene. this gene  has gotten me into so much trouble over the years. for instance, more than one anesthesiologist has told me that patients with red hair have more trouble with anesthesia- i.e. nausea and vomiting. my obstetrician  told me that women with red hair have unpredictable labor and deliveries. my dermatologist told me that freckled, fair skinned redheads have more skin issues, and the list goes on. i was teased a lot about my red hair growing up. but that seemed to change in college. i was suddenly admired for my uniqueness (translation: i had more dates). joking aside, i probably do have a lot of recessive genes, and without going into a science lesson, i will just say that it does play a part in my tendency to have the weird stuff. another example of this is the fact that only about 5% of thyroid nodules are cancerous, and less than 10% of women have the type of breast cancer that i was diagnosed with ( invasive lobular). add this  to that the fact that only 2% or so of the population has red hair.there  must be a conspiracy theory in this somewhere,

so the countdown to my CAT scan  has begun. the wicked witch of the west has turned the hour glass over, and my testing time is getting closer. if i can just get by this hurdle, the doctors will leave me alone until october- i think, unless i have to have more blood work done before then. but i am never sure what my red hair gene will do next.