part three of my adventures with breast cancer: healing from the chemotherapy, and reconstruction. or as my plastic surgeon calls it " the expansion process.". we are headed out west, i guess......

there are so many parts to a journey with breast cancer. i had no idea. i am finished with part one, the surgery, and thank goodness with part two, the chemotherapy, i am still struggling with some nausea and a few other side effects from the medications that they gave me,  but i am so relieved to be finished with that part! i just have to rest and be patient with myself. it is going to take some time. more time  than i had imagined when i first was diagnosed. it helps, i think, to try to take things one step at a time. there is so much to consider- it is really overwhelming to try to think about everything at once. of course, i have researched, and tried to be well informed about my choices, but sometimes it is good to just consider what is right in front of you.

and speaking of what is right in front of me, that brings up the subject of my " foobies". i have had difficulty deciding what to call my reconstructed "breasts". foobies is a term favored by a lot of women who have had breast cancer.  my real breasts are gone. i regret having had breast cancer, but i think that i made the correct decision in having the double mastectomies. as my  general surgeon said, you sure do not want to have to do this twice! i told my surgeon that i wanted to be aggressive in my treatment, in hopes that the cancer does not return. hopefully, that will be the case. now, back to the foobies. breast reconstruction is different than breast augmentation. or as my plastic surgeon put it, " you are not getting a boob job, honey." some people have said that i am lucky, that i will have" perky breasts". here is the truth: they feel like rocks on my chest.  at times, i can feel the metal ports where the saline is injected and it is uncomfortable. a wide part of my chest is permanently numb, but i can feel the areas above and below  where my breasts were. the inserts that i have now are temporary. when the surgeon and i quit "discussing" how much saline that needs to be added, i will have another surgery and the permanent ones will be inserted.

i have opted for the silicone inserts. the saline ones can " pucker". boy, that gives you a good picture in your head, right? also, thankfully, there has been much improvement made in the silicone inserts. instead of a possible leakage if somehow they are damaged, the new silicone inserts stay together. and they are soft- something my plastic surgeon has reminded me of several times when i complain about the stiffness of the temporary saline inserts. i love my plastic surgeon, but he always tells me how it is.

so for now, i am trying to rest and get rid of some more of this nausea. i am also continuing along with the reconstruction process, aka the" expansion process". my surgery can not take place until mid to late october because the doctors want me to be recovered and my blood work to be back to normal before i have more done . so, i am continuing to see my plastic surgeon every couple of weeks or so, and we go a few rounds about how far out west my foobies will travel. i know that he has my best interests at heart, but i would just as soon keep my foobies closer to my chest.