" oh, the W-A-I-T-I-N-G is the hardest part" i believe tom petty said this. waiting is the AWFUL part. i said that.

today i went to see my plastic surgeon. i drove myself, and was a little nervous about driving in hickory. you would think that living about an hour away from hickory  all these years, i would be used to the crazy street names there, but i am not. my surgeon's office was on 50 13th ave. ne. of course, there is a 13th street, and a 13th avenue place, which might be near 13th avenue circle, or miles away! coming back, i had to find 5th avenue. there is a 3rd avenue, but no 4th avenue. perhaps the street planner had something again the number four?  still, i had a hand drawn map, that jeff made for me, so i got there no problem. i have a problem with most nav systems. it seems that they do not want to go the same way that i do. all that i hear from them is " re-directing, re-directing," and it drives me crazy.

the plastic  surgeon explained the reconstruction part of the surgery to me, and gave me a few options. it is more complicated than i had first thought , and will involve another surgery in about 2 months from now. but i am sure that it is much improved from just a few years ago, and for that i am thankful. i was not sure that i wanted to have this done. it is a personal decision, but my general surgeon highly recommended me having the reconstruction. i thought perhaps i was too old to have this done, but the surgeon assured me that i was not too old, and that it would make things a lot easier clothes wise.

of course, nothing about this whole thing is simple. the plastic surgeon will be there for the surgery, but if my general surgeon " finds something", and decides that i will need radiation, then it is a no go for the reconstruction. if i have to have chemotherapy,  the plastic surgeon can proceed. but radiation therapy changes the tissues, so i would have to wait until much later for the reconstruction.

i wondered about the term " finds something". this has been used a lot during my journey with breast cancer. i mean, they found cancer, all right. what else is there to find? loose change? a set of car keys that i lost one time? i am trying to stay optimistic about this, though. i am hoping that the general surgeon would not have the plastic surgeon come on board unless he felt that i have a good chance of having the reconstruction done at this point.

so, the two surgeons are still trying to coordinate their schedules. i have no surgery date at this time. the plastic surgeon's nurse is supposed to call me when they can get the surgery scheduled. i am hoping it will be next week, but it might be the week after. i am planning on working two days next week so that i can save up as much time as possible for after the surgery, and perhaps for my chemotherapy, should i need it. it is just a guess, but i am thinking that i will need some chemotherapy. i will just have to wait and see what my doctors think about that when the time comes. in the meantime, i am just playing the waiting game.....